INSIDE SCOOP WITH PAMROC: Finding Love After 40—It Ain’t for the Weak!

Let’s talk real for a minute: finding someone after 40 is hard. Like, harder-than-finding-your-glasses-when-they’re-on-your-head hard.

Rocco and I? We found each other in what I like to call the “Second Chapter of Life.” I was a single mom, never married. He was divorced, with three kids—one still in high school at the time. We didn’t meet through a match service or an app (no swiping involved). We met the good old-fashioned way: in person. Organic. Unfiltered. And honestly? That was pure luck.

Fast forward five years—now we’re married, building businesses, traveling, and enjoying what we both call the best time of our lives.

But here’s the twist: we have a whole crew of fabulous single friends… and they’re constantly asking,
“Can you introduce me to someone?”

And we want to help—really, we do! But let’s be honest: matchmaking at this stage in life? It’s a minefield. People are settled, comfortable, and sometimes… a little too set in their ways. Some don’t want to change a thing, and finding someone who fits into that exact blueprint? Tough.

So here’s the real question:
Where do people even meet in person at this point in our lives?

A bar? Maybe… but most nights, we’re in bed by 9:30 with our shows queued up and a glass of wine in hand.

A nightclub? Unless it’s playing 80s throwbacks and has comfy seating—hard pass. We’re not trying to shout over bass-heavy music we don’t even recognize just to say, “Hi, what do you do for work?”

The truth is, most of us don’t want to meet someone in a place that doesn’t reflect who we are anymore. We’re past the days of shots and strobe lights. Give us meaningful conversation, shared laughs, a good wine list, and yes—some Journey, Prince, or Whitney in the background, please and thank you.

Now, don’t get us wrong—we’re not bashing dating apps. We’ve actually seen some of our friends meet online, fall in love, and get married. It can work! But lately, many of our single friends are saying the same thing:

“It’s all hookups now. No one’s really looking for a real relationship anymore.”

We have close friends who raised their kids, built their careers, and are now finally taking a breath—saying things like:

“I don’t want to grow old alone.”
“I just want someone to have a nice dinner and real conversation with.”
“I don’t need to get married again—I just want someone to come home to and watch a good show with.”

And we hear them. Loud and clear.

That’s why we’re starting to think…
Maybe it’s time to create new spaces.
Spaces where people over 40 (and fabulous), who are so done with the dating games, can connect in real life. With music we actually know the words to, great vibes, and zero pressure.

Maybe it’s time for… PamRoc Mixers?
Are you still hopeful? Completely over it? Met someone amazing? We want to hear it all.

Because love doesn’t have an expiration date.
But it does deserve a fresh start, a glass of wine, and maybe a slow dance or two.

Want to see more? From wine tastings to resort lounging, we captured it all! Follow us at PamRoc Lifestyle on Facebook 🔵 and @PamRoc_Lifestyle on Instagram for all the island vibes, cocktail magic, dreamy hotel stays, and nonstop travel inspo.